Thread:CactusKing/@comment-38497603-20190828000719/@comment-38497603-20190829140951

Dude, how have you not heard of the Mysterios? The Mysteriosiidae were some of the strangest species of "Toasterfish" to have ever lived! Between 777 and 666 million years ago, they made up 69% of life on Earth. They thrived underneath the World Glacier, due to their elemental ice properties, and took over every part of the food chain, they were the photosynthesizers, herbivores, carnivores and decomposers. All the species of Mysteriosiidae shared a common language, and communicated using VHS tapes made of liquid Nitrogen. They formed a Technate, lead by the Grand Emperor of Frozen Cream Cheese Toast, and actively sought to exterminate the rebel Metazoans. You can even see their technological progression, starting with their invention of tube-top submarines, 4-dimensional rockets, an intergalactic bus service, and finally the pinnacle of all their intelligence and achievement: the rusty nail. The Mysteriosiidae finally got deadly foots up their butts when the rogue Red Algae faction invented Marmalade, using it to shift the Earth from being an elemental ice planet to an elemental fruit planet. But ancient Antarctican scriptures say that the Toasterfish still survive in the inverses of the Andromeda Galaxy, and someday they will come back to eat all of our Avocados to kill us all.